This post comes to you from a moment of reflection, written from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico.
At 33 years old, I’ve been coming here once a year with my family for nearly 25 years.
There is mostly nostalgia attached to this magical sun-soaked haven, however, I am also reminded of the memories that literally bring tears to my eyes when I think of them today…
I spent every high school and college spring break here. I can remember those awful thoughts that would run through my head, beating me down, as I would punish myself for not looking “perfect”.
In fact, there were years when all of my waking hours were spent comparing my body to all the “pretty girls”. I would wish I had that perfect flat belly, and that my shoulders and arms weren’t so bulky, that my boobs were bigger, my feet were smaller, and on and on it went.
I would blame it on my body every time a guy wouldn’t show me any interest. And conversely when I received attention, I would re-enforce my skewed mindset by being proud of myself that I hadn’t eaten those chips with dinner. Obviously, that’s why I looked good enough to be attractive to him in that moment, right?
OMG! To think back on the years of self-shaming is awful. The stories in my head were brutally punishing and downright painful.
I would NEVER say those kinds of things to anyone else! I would never let a friend talk about herself that way! But I had no problem saying those things to myself…
In my early 20’s following years of fighting the uphill battle of achieving “good enough” status, I finally threw in the towel. Years of struggling with eating disorders, addiction, anxiety, and depression had done me in.
I started down a path of recovery, what I now call holistic nutrition.
I admitted defeat, I asked for help, and I began to develop a loving relationship with myself that would eventually become the cornerstone of my life today.
In Holistic Nutrition for Women In Recovery I talk about how to begin breaking down those walls of skewed self-perception by beginning to develop a healthy relationship with yourself.
Healthy relationships are an essential part of the paradigm, and it all begins with the relationship with yourself. It’s all about self-love, girl!
It’s time to love, admire, and accept yourself for the perfectly flawless, unique, stunning, and incredibly amazing woman that YOU ALREADY ARE.
Adopting the principles of holistic nutrition has woken me up to this reality. Turns out, I’ve been lovable this whole time!
It pains me to think of how much harm I did to my body, mind and spirit through the years of suffering behind the walls of false perceptions.
And let me tell you that there is absolutely nothing shameful in admitting defeat. Vulnerability can seem terrifying but there is an incredible amount of power and energy in “getting real” with yourself and others.
When we are willing to get vulnerable and stop hiding behind the false mask of “perfection”, our realities begin to shift toward breaking free from the false perceptions we’ve been conditioned to believe.
Let me be the first to tell you that if you can relate to this negative self-talk, especially in regards to an inability to love your body just the way it is, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
It’s not surprising that so many women feel this way about their bodies when the society we live in promotes beauty in a way that is grossly skewed. We’ve been conditioned to believe we are not “good enough”.
We are told to “suck our stomachs in”.
We are sold padded bras to “fill us out” and panty hose that squeeze our midsections in tight.
We are taught that being beautiful means having zero percent body fat and wearing make-up to cover-up our skin and distort our eyes.
On a very real, and serious level, trying to look like “that girl” is causing millions of women to suffer in ways that I would never wish upon anyone in this world.
Breaking free from the prison walls we build for ourselves, from feeling like we are not “good enough”, begins with re-writing the story reel.
Adopting these principles of holistic nutrition and walking the path of regaining all that self-love back has been a journey worth taking.
It’s given me the tools to re-write my story and is an actionable plan that I can turn to on a daily basis for guidance and encouragement to continue deepening the love for myself and others so that I never have to believe that I am anything less than perfect, just the way I am.
My body, mind, emotions, and psyche have begun to heal and transform in ways I never imagined were possible. The depth of gratitude and love I have today was worth the struggle.
I was inspired to write this today because I was overcome with compassion and empathy for that girl who used to walk around carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders.
I offer a moment of love and compassion for any woman who knows this kind of suffering.
It’s never an easy path to walk but the promise of freedom from breaking free from the walls of self-destructive thoughts is waiting for you and is more powerful than any set of false perceptions you were conditioned to believe.
If you are wondering how nutritional therapy and holistic nutrition can help you re-write your story, you can contact me here.
I also want to share another inspiring resource on the topic of body image. A fellow NTP, Daniele Della Valle, shares her story and offers incredible insight and inspiration for breaking free from these false perceptions of body image that our society holds for women. The book is called “Happy Weight – Unlocking Body Confidence Through Bioindividual Nutrition And Mindfulness”.